grateful.......

So, here we are..............Thanksgiving is upon us. In fact, as I write this, pies are baking, tea is brewing, and turkeys everywhere have met their fate.

All week I have been thinking about giving thanks...............how much I have to give thanks for. My family, my friends, the food in my stomach and the roof over my head.........but during my thinking, and my thanking, I thought of all the small things that make up a good life, ....MY good life,.....that never get credit, never get talked about, and go mostly by the wayside, unappreciated. This blog is for you, comfy bed......and for you my porch rocker.....and for all of the small things that make my life good.

I am grateful for my claw foot bath tub. When I soak in it, bubbles up to my neck, lights out and candles lit, sweet fragrant steam billowing around me, I realize I am in my own private spa....and I am grateful that I have somewhere to soak,......physically and spiritually.

I am thankful for my yarns. If there were jewels, I would be a princess, if they were clothes, I would be a fashionista.......if they were toys, I would be the most well liked, sought after kid on the block. But they are yarns......They inspire me, they comfort me, they bring me peace and solidarity and artistry, and besides, they are good insulation on those cold windy winter nights.

I am grateful for ginger snaps and Earl Grey tea....Does anything make one feel so pampered, so taken care of as a quiet moment alone, dipping that hard crispy gingersnap into the piping hot tea, and pulling it out, warm and gooey and soft?

I am grateful for duct tape......It fixes my dryer, my pipes, and my printer, and does double duty as a cool accessory in a belt, a wallet, or strangely, a hat. (Take note, daughters: ALWAYS keep duct tape within arms reach)

I am grateful for my clothes line.......Now, I rarely use it, but when I do, the pure, clean smell of fresh sheets in summertime instantly takes me back in time to a different time, a time when my mom made hot dog gravy and wore her housecoat all day on a Sunday. I can make my childhood re-appear at whim simply by hanging a couple of old wet towels on a rope in the wind.

I am thankful for Charmin toilet paper.....it may seem small to some, but when you have been a poor girl more than half your life, there is something luxurious and enriching about feeling a soft tissue on your bum. (It also stays together amazingly well when wiping a baby bum....particularly important if you are too poor to afford wet wipes)

I am thankful for a full drawer of light bulbs.....................nothing says "all is well in the world" quite like being able to have all of the lights on in your house at one time.

I am grateful for having several kinds of drawing paper in my house. Gone are the days of drawing on college ruled notebook paper. I now have vellum, and card stock, and watercolor paper, and even pastel paper.....and imagine how grateful I would be if I had the time to spend with all of this great paper. But having it means that a day will come when I WILL have the time to draw on it, and for that, I am grateful.

I am grateful for all of the mess in my house.......for it means I HAVE a house, I have people, I have pets and ALL of this clutter which makes me crazy means I have a full, productive life.

I am grateful to hear my Daddy laugh. It's a small sound, (mostly)....sometimes it's a big belly laugh, but it warms and nourishes my soul like hot cinnamon oatmeal on a frosty morning.

I am grateful for my sisters and for their differences,......perhaps MAINLY because of their differences. They are quirky and funky and kind and sometimes selfish. They are honest and hard working and sometimes obsessive compulsive, but I love them, and have reached this place in my life where I like all of their qualities, especially if the cranky is directed at someone else....

They are mine, and for that, I am grateful.

I am thankful for the way my feet feel when I acknowledge their existence and spend a moment or two getting to know them again. I lather and slather them, and I am so grateful for the sensation of freshly lotioned feet sliding on warm flannel sheets at bedtime.

I am grateful for flannel sheets. I am grateful that my 'common girls" desire for flannel makes me as happy as a rich girls desire for silk....My flannel sheets.....they're soft, they're warm, and they are like a big textile hug from the universe.

I am thankful that my husband loves me just the way I am. He's not wealthy, not famous, not showy.......but he is strong and kind and patient and makes me laugh. He accepts that I like flannel and not silk so much, and he tolerates my yarn.......

I am thankful that my grandsons call me "Nana"......not sure why, but everytime I hear it, I feel like a superstar................"Nana...SUPERSTAR!!!"

I am grateful for tall socks.....(check out sockdreams.com- for those of you unfamiliar with tall socks) They keep me warm, and covered, and make me feel alternately hippie and chic.

I am thankful for my most simplest of tastes............the joy I find in grape jelly on a saltine.....and it doesn't even have to be Welch's OR Zesta.

I am thankful for Mary and Brenda........my imaginary friends. They know me perhaps better than anyone at all....they hear me whine, they hear me gripe, they "see" me at my best and at my worst, and at every stop from one to the other, and they get 100% pure Lori because there is no risk,...........and through their eyes, I see myself, or what I could be....They make me feel smart and brave, and artsy and talented and loving and kind and well, cool.

And I am grateful for my "here and now" friends......even though I am too busy to see them much,......... to talk to them,........ be with them, when push comes to shove, they are there, and everyone of them is different and like a polished gem, I see and love a different part of me because I see and love a different part of them.

I am grateful for cinnamon toast.......just when you think there is nothing decadent in the house to eat when your thoughts are spiraling down, down down, and all you want to do is numb yourself with candy or ice cream......there is the singular pleasure of cinnamon and sugar and butter slathered across your toast like sauce on a pizza, and you tell yourself, "oh well, this isn't junk..........this is good for me, I mean it is a breakfast food, right?" RIGHT?????????

I am thankful for those short bouts of self love and forgiveness that I have when I tell myself, "it's alright that you ate all of that sugar....just this once,....after all, you had a bad day and you deserve some pleasure"

I could go on and on and on and on........................................and for all of this I am grateful. I am easily amused......I am a simple girl, with simple wants, simple pleasures.........

I thank you, Heavenly Father for fashioning me this way. I thank you for the people and the places You have put in my life, and I thank You for the circumstances that got me here. Though life has been hard sometimes,..............sadness almost too much to bear....grief and loss, betrayal.....anxiety that makes it almost impossible to breathe, I am all I am because of the journey here, and I pray, Lord God, that I continue to have a grateful heart. I pray for peace...peace for me, peace for my loved ones, and peace for the world. And when I am feeling dissatisfied, or feeling sorry for myself, help me God to find the small things that make my life feel full. I am trying like heck to NOT need the hard lessons anymore....

Can I get an "A" for effort?

Happy Thanksgiving to all of you. Be blessed!