How much is mine?

How much is mine? How much hurt and disillusionment should I take responsibility for? I hate it when my children run into another obstacle in life. Never mind that I have run into it, (oft times, over and over and OVER again)....somehow "I" have the strength and fortitude for it. The stamina.....the wherewithal....What a load of crap! Or not....I mean I do have the strength and endurance and stability to muddle through. What I don't have is the fortitude it takes to deal with them finding their own strength.
I believe that maybe........................just maybe, I need to loosen my tight vise grip on their problems and emotions, and just let them work it out themselves. Instead of chronic anxiety and worry, what if I, just decide,........let's say,.....................to believe they can do it for themselves....
I know they can. (I think they can, I think they can.........I think they can)
Have I just stumbled onto the mythical figurative Valium bottle? Is it truly possible that I can begin to relax in my day to day operations, confident in the knowledge that they can take care of themselves?

See........here is the thing. Times are tight...life is hard.....
I went through times of no money, (or little money) times of no utilities.....times of loneliness and despair..times wondering where the next meal was coming from...and they were MISERABLE.....scary....and even demeaning, and I hate that my own children would ever have to feel that way....BUTTTTTTTTTT.....
today I can stand on my own two feet (sometimes awkwardly, but stand nonetheless), with a confidence that I can take care of myself. Maybe not in luxury, but I do have all I need to work and provide food and shelter for myself. Maybe that confidence came from the scariness of not having. and maybe, ..............just maybe, my values come from the not having....
Like maybe I don't need a fancy car and fancy McMansion to live in because I realize and value the riches of a soft warm bed and a full stomach, watching tv in my cozy little home.

So, here, then, is my assignment: I will watch, (and watch carefully) for the telltale signs of starvation or lack of hot water (Ewww)....I will watch for the crossover from "worried about what we are gonna do" to "Let's rob a bank". I will watch to make sure that they know that I love them more than life itself, and that I am so incredibly proud of them...I will make sure they know that I am behind them,...but then,
(from my secret hiding place under the stairs)I will allow them the dignity and respect to work it out....to come up with their own solutions, and to feel the confidence and strength that comes with it. I will.....I WILL...(I think I can, I think I can,........I think I can."